How to ask her dad for her hand in marriage
Asking for the father’s blessing is a tradition many men still honour up until this day
Even though asking for her father’s blessing is an age-old tradition that dates back to ancient Rome, it’s still a custom which is honoured up until this day. It might feel like a daunting task to fulfil but asking for her father’s blessing in marriage still remains to be a sign of respect. It’s also a magical time for you to bond with your future father-in-law and make your intentions towards his daughter very clear. If you’re nervous about having the discussion with your future father-in-law, put your mind at ease with a few of these useful tips:
HAVE THE DISCUSSION WITH HER LOVED ONES
Having ‘the talk’ with her parents is a sign of respect
Start by asking her friends and siblings if the discussion with her dad is something that she would expect from you. If she has a good relationship with her parents the chances are good that she would find ‘the talk’ with her father as a sign of respect. This would also be your opportunity to try and find out what her father expects from you.
TALK TO HER ABOUT MARRIAGE
Make sure to find out how she feels about you talking to her dad before proposing
Before getting down on one knee make sure marriage it truly in the cards for the both of you. It might feel like you both are head over heels for one another, but you never know how she really feels about such a big commitment. This is until the two of you sit down and have the discussion. During this time you could also casually ask her about the tradition. This will show her that you take her feelings into consideration rather than relying on her father’s blessing.
MAKE SURE TO ASK HIM IN PERSON
Schedule a time to ask her parents for their blessing in person
If you’re planning on asking for her father’s blessing take a deep breath and schedule a time you can meet with him in person. It’s important to have the conversation in person rather than sending him an email or a text message. If her father or parents live far away the next best thing would be to schedule a Skype or phone call. This is definitely a time for you to have a meaningful chat with her parents, rather than type.
KEEP OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS IN MIND
Evaluate her family dynamic and make sure to ask the right person for their blessing
It has always been an age-old tradition to ask for your significant other’s father for her hand in marriage. However, in most cases, the tradition has become more modern by not only asking for her father’s blessing but also her mother, brother, sister, aunt, uncle or step-parents. Try and evaluate her family dynamic and make sure to ask the right person for their blessing. If it’s hard for you to narrow it down, play it safe by sitting down with the entire family before popping the question.
MAKE YOUR INTENTIONS CLEAR
Let her father know just how serious you consider the commitment to their daughter
The conversation you’re planning to have with her parents is a great opportunity for you to let them know exactly you feel about their daughter. Make sure you tell them just how much you care about her and that you plan to cherish the commitment towards her for the rest of your life. Tell them just how happy and excited it will make you feel to spend the rest of your life with their daughter. Make sure to add that it would be an absolute honour to join their special family.
TELL THE FAMILY ABOUT YOUR LOVE STORY
Lift the mood by telling a romantic story of how you met or when you fell in love
Instead of starting a very serious conversation with her parents lift the mood by telling them a very romantic story about how you met. If they’re already familiar with the story tell them about when you knew she was the one. The romantic story will hopefully hit a soft spot with her parents, and before you know it you would be ready to propose.
PERSONALISE THE DISCUSSION
Personalise the conversation by adding a few of your future father in-law’s favourite things
Before scheduling a time with her parents or just her father make the special occasional a bit more personal. Try and find out what her father prefers in term of a drink, snack or a meal; this will show him that you’ve been paying attention to his likings and you are willing to go the extra mile. The one-on-one conversation will definitely create a special bond between the two of you that you would be able to treasure forever.
MAKE THE CONVERSATION UNFORGETTABLE
Capture the special moment by taking a picture with your future father in-law
This is a very intimate time you will have with your future bride-to-be’s parents. So, why not caption the special moment with a picture of you and her dad shaking hands or giving each other a high-five or a hug? It will be such a special moment that you will be able to share with your future wife after the two of you are married. You can even go above and beyond and ask your future in-laws to record a special message that you can play on the big day.
ASK FOR HER FATHER’S BLESSING
Ask her father or parents for their blessing rather than asking for their permission
In the 21st century, it’s more a custom to ask her father or parents for their blessing rather than asking for their permission. By doing this, you’re showing them that you have enough respect for them to be them part of the proposal process, but that the decision ultimately relies on their daughter. In the end, it’s up to your future bride-to-be to decide whether she will be accepting your proposal.
Asking for her parent’s blessing might seem nerve-wracking. But, with these useful tips, you can make the conversation both memorable and special for the both of you. Make sure to take a deep breath and enjoy every moment of the unforgettable event. With his blessing and a diamond engagement ring in hand, you’ll be on the lookout for the best places to propose.